Pure and Utter Chaos
by Lenore Deloncre
Summary: see below!!


Title: Pure and Utter Chaos

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Author: A combined effort from RB, Laura, Shauna, Lana, Brett and Iggeh.

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Rating: R (violence, language)

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Summary: ok, this is actually a modified trannie of an RP we did, placing X-men chars in a spoof spy movie. 

The lines ------------- indicate a quick scene change. This jumps around a lot.

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Disclaimer: All X-men chars are the property of Marvel Comics, and all Original Chars are the property of their Creators.

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(The writers take no responsibility for any injuries sustained reading

this fic. They sustained enough writing it.))

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Kurt Wagner laughed with that typical Evil Villain flourish as he pushed the button that activated the videophone, which took up one huge wall on the side of his lair. He grabbed his hairless cat, Mr. Puss Puss, and patted him as the face of Jack Bond, his greatest foe appeared on the screen.

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"Yes, Jack Bo-oh, it's you again. Don't you have better things to do with your TIME, Mr. Wagner?" 

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Kurt laughed evilly again, shaking his head. "Oh, but toying vith yo-" he was cut off short by Jack Bond. 

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"Hold on...before we go through THAT particular point of the conversation again...I've just got to ask you...WHAT is WITH that RED AND BLACK LEOTARD YOU'RE WEARING???" 

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Kurt bristled in anger. "DO NOT INSULT ZHE SUPER VILLIAN COSTUME! I have vorn zhis for MANY YEARS, I'll have you KNOW!" 

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Jack laughed once, as if in his own personal joke. "Must be getting pretty stinky over there, huh?" 

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Kurt practically dropped the cat in anger, which let out a loud YEOOOOWL! in surprise. "YOU KNOW VHAT I MEANT, YOU...YOU...YOU STUFFY BRITISH CAD!" 

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"Ah...resorting to name calling are we now, Mr. Wagner? Well, get on with it. What's your master plan so I can come and take you out and destroy your weapon and everything." 

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Kurt pouted, turning his back to the camera. "Vell, if you're goink to be zhat vay about it, I von't tell you." 

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He let out a sniffle, and Jack Bond was seen to try not to laugh on the screen. "Oh, come on. Be a good sport and tell me your super villain plan now so we can have our little fights and get it over with. I won't make fun of your..."super villain costume." 

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Whilst all this was happening, Lenore Deloncre ran quickly across the grounds, crouched low to avoid being seen. She felt like she was stuck in some bad spy movie, maybe Austin Powers. She was going to kill Scott Summers for giving her this assignment. She finally reached the back door, oogling at the fact that there was no one guarding it. She grabbed a small wad of what looked like play dough from her belt and set it on the lock, fixing in a small fuse wire and lighting it, running around the corner of the building, waiting until the small explosion blew out the lock. She ran back to the door, kicking it in, and glancing down at the black leather jumpsuit she was wearing. Scott was definitely going to fry in hell for this one. She quickly stepped into the complex, closing her eyes as she pictured the map she had looked at, and set of at a run for the labs that contained Kurt.

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(back to our Villain!!))

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Kurt let out another sniffle and glanced back over his shoulder at the screen. "Promise...?" 

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Jack Bond nodded, as if slightly annoyed and ready to get this over with. "Yes, yes, I promise to make fun of your Super Villain Suit."

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Kurt, not noticing the strategically left out word, seemed to become happy again and turned around, nodding. "Oh, alright, if you put it that way. Now, what is something that EVERYONE NEEDS??? COFFEE!!! MUA HAHAHAHAHAHA! Now, if you would look over here..." at this, he points the phone's camera over to another area of the lab, to show a typical big...super villain...thingy, pointed through a hole in the roof of the building and at some strategic target. "I have come up vith zhe PERFECT plan! If by 3 o'clock tomorrow, or two o'clock...I might be out at a Super Villain seminar, I do not receive 5 BILLION DOLLARS and control of a SMALL CITY-STATE, I vill BLOW UP ZHE COLUMBIAN COFFEE FIELDS! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAA!!!" 

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Lenore rounded a corner, and saw Kurt talking to some goofy British guy on a large screen. Oh this was getting so Spy movie Cliched she thought she was going to vomit. She quickly dodged behind a computer console, watching Kurt and listening, hoping she'd be able t hit him with the tranquilliser gun Scott had strapped to her thigh. She swore that if that man ever insisted upon strapping that gun on her himself again, he was going to have trouble counting to ten when he only had 7 fingers. 

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Jack Bond merely looked unamused at Kurt, and began to talk in monotone, as if preoccupied. "Oh, no, what are we going to do without our Coffee? The horror of it all. I won't be able to go on my missions, without coffee. Even though there are Coffee fields all over the world now. How are we ever going to get through this one?" 

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Kurt glared at him, narrowing his yellow eyes. "you know, you COULD at least sound FRIGHTENED! Remember back in SUPER VILLIAN AND SPY SCHOOL??? THEN you vould at least TRY und act SCARED about my EVIL PLANS!!!" 

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Jack sighed, shaking his head. "Mr. Wagner, you do know that your plan is only going to get bungled up by your henchmen, don't you??? They'll knock the device over, it'll break, and you'll be out of a villainous plan." 

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Kurt blinked, looking a bit worried now..."Not zhis time...it's FOOLPROOF!" 

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Jack laughed, shaking his head. "You know it will happen. So, why not just try and come up with another plan." 

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Kurt pouted again, slouching and crossing his arms. "Vell, if you're going to be so mean about it, I don't zhink I vill." 

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Jack sighed, looking a bit apologetic. "Oh, come on, Mr. Wagner. you can come up with really good ideas." 

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Kurt let out a bit of a sniffle and looked up a bit at the screen. "Really...?" 

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Jack nodded back at him slightly. "Sure. Just come up with another plan to take over a Small City-State and call me back, ok?" 

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At this, Kurt instantly seemed happier, and nodded. "Ok! I know!!! I can...YEAH! ooh, zhought I vas goink to tell you my evil plan, EH??? BWA HAHAHAHA! Not zhat easy, BOND!" and with that, he switched off the videophone and started to go back to his evil villainous planny thingys.

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A slender form slipped quietly through the shadows before pausing behind the chair of her boss, reaching forwards she runs her hands over his shoulders and eyes the phone screen and the man in it. "Aahhh...zee famous Jack Bond...I see he is out for me...I mean to ruin your plans again, boss.." She was in the usual form fitting bad girl suit, the black leather clinging to her every curve and molding over her breasts as she whispered into Kurt's ear. "Sir....We have companeee...The front door to our secret hide-out that no one can find because it is a zecret has been blown to smithereens....and it was very cruel...for the door was not even locked...how could someone hurt a door like that for no reazon..." She blinks her large eyes, blonde hair falling over her face before she pushed it back and continued. "Also....the henchmen...say that they are ready to do your orders....but...they are also complaining about zee walls.... for some reason there seems to be a conspiracy..they say....and the walls are moving in front of them so they run into all of them. I do not know if this is some vile scheme of Jack Bond's or not...but it is happening nonetheless..." 

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She watches as he clicks the screen off before patting his shoulders, "Do not worry, sir...your plans are very well thought....ve shall make one together....but you are ze mastermind here...I am only here to make you look good..." 

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Lenore knelt behind the computer console, and slipped two darts into the barrel of the gun, pulling it from her thigh holster. She then brought the gun up so it was resting on top of the console, and lined up Kurt's assistant in her sights. realising she had been discovered, she knew she had to do something quick, and slowly, she squeezed the trigger.

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Kurt looked up at Booby Larue with a slightly confused look on his face. "Vhat do you mean someone has blown up zhe secret hidden front entrance vhich vas unlocked so conveniently??? I zhought I sent Henr-oh no. Henry vasn't at zhe front door? Vhat vas he doink??? Or vas it Harold I sent to guard zhe secret unlocked hidden front entrance and HENRY I sent to guard zhe super secret conveniently opened air duct passagevay???"

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Booby Larue yawns lightly as she waits for Kurt to respond to her words before she glances at her nails, a gasp passing her lips as she sees one of her rather long and neon pink fake fingernails gone. A scream loud enough to split Kurt's eardrums passes her lips as she begins to hyperventilate, "No...this...this cannot be! It's all Jack Bond's fault! He has made me break a nail....how could he! We use to have a fling with one another and this is how he repays me...!..." She blinks as she looks down to the ground and sees the rather bright nail, her eyes going round before she giggles and flushes. "Oops...silly me..." She bends down and gets it just as the dart was let loose and 

flew over her to sink into the wooden back of the chair Kurt sat in. She stands back up after a moment and eyes the nail before pressing it onto her finger and then glancing at the dart with wide eyes. "Now now....Mister K....." She giggles goofily before going on, "I never knew you liked me enough to try and sedate me to take advantage of me....

you even have the kinky suit and all....!"She looked over him, giggling squeaky like before blinking her big eyes and looking away from him. "Oh...Harold was busy....and Henry...well he might have been busy as well.....or was that Sean...oiy...I can't keep any of them straight these days..." 

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Lenore winced as the ditz ducked. Lenore spoke quickly into a mike attached to her wrist, hoping that Jujei was listening "Ok, I have the target in sights, preparing to tranquillise. Where are you??" She waited for him to reply, locking Kurt into her sight, still amazed by the fact that nobody had seen the girl in a black leather, cat-suit style jumpsuit. She felt like that chick from the Avengers movie, except without that stupid belt.

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Jujei rolled down some, avoiding some guards some. He then tapped into his Mic, in the earpiece on his left ear, 'Do whatever you need to Lenore, I am in the second floor balcony...I'm about to enter the secondary computer room...wish me luck" he said, before running toward the door. His coat flapped behind him some, he quickly spun around and grabbed a hold of his twin Desert Eagle .50's, and kicked the door, quickly entering, and gunshots heard over the Mic some...

The henchmen didn't seem too excited by Jujei's Entrance. They looked up at him with completely uneventful expressions, before being shot down. It was just that they'd never had the chance to actually have a FIGHT in the building! none of the super villainy plans ever got off the ground. 

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Kurt blinked when he heard Booby, wincing and wiggling a finger in his ear, barely hearing what she'd said. "Ouch! I'm deaf again! Booby, you're really goink to have to learn to control zhat screamink of yours!" When she mentioned the dart, he barely heard her, and all he mostly heard was "mumblemumble...mummmemurmermumblemumble," so he turned around in his chair, sitting on his knees to look over the back of the seat at her. "Vhat did you say? I couldn't hear you?" That was when he saw her looking at the dart and blinked, looking down at the dart in front of him for a moment. "Now, vhere did zhat come from? Did you do zhat? Vhere's zhe dart board at??? I vant to play!!! Screw comink up vith anozher Super Villiany Plan for now!*

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Lenore winced hearing the gunshots over the mike, praying that Jujei hadn't gotten himself in trouble. seeing Kurt turn, she grinned and lined the sight up with his neck 'Gotcha" she quickly pressed the trigger. if this one missed, she was just going to strangle them both unconscious.

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Booby's eyes went wide as he said he didn't know where it had come from. She shrugs lightly after a moment and looks over her shoulder, "I don't know, Kurt....I thought it was you..." She was obviously disappointed that he wasn't getting kinky with her and slid onto the edge of his desk, a brow arching as another dart suddenly flies through the air and sinks into her bosses neck. She giggles, looking back in the direction of where it might have came, "Thankyou, whoever you are! Now he's mine...all mine!!!" She moves forwards and slips her arms about Kurt, dragging him out of the chair and moving to carry him off to another room before pausing, "Wait....why would someone be shooting at us? Maybe zay wanna get kinkeh too?" 

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Jujei smirked some, he gunned down two henchmen, who made the mistake of not checking the door. He ran over to the computer, making sure he locked the door himself. He quickly began to type some things in, he pulled out a CD and inserted it into the computer, "Okay, Mr. Virus..do your worst..."he smirked as the virus began to load into the computer, but it wasn't fast enough. Suddenly a henchman, apparently not dead, came up behind him and tried to do a bear hug. Jujei grunted some, and sent a back heel toward the man's crotch. He was quickly dropped and the man fell to the ground in pain, holding his crotch. he then kick the man in the jaw some, rendering unconscious, "Can't beat a man...think like a woman..."he giggled some, turning to eye the progress of the virus, he cursed some, it still wasn't loading as fast as he had hoped. but as long as they don't find and counter the virus in time, even if it wasn't full loaded, it will still do some damage.

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Lenore shook her head and face-palmed, sliding the tranquilliser gun back into her thigh holster. Scott was so dead when she got back to the mansion. maybe se should tie him up and lock him in a room with Booby. that seemed like punishment enough. She made her way around the room, darting behind consoles until she appeared behind Booby "Uhhhh mind if I get kinky with you?" it was the only way she could think of getting close to Kurt.

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The Computer that Jujei was loading the virus up into brought a large happy face emblem up when he started and a loud, cheerful voice said "Thank you! Loading Virus into your Virus repository, Mr. Wagner! Shall we send it to any large Government's main computer systems?" 

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Kurt simply twitched to the side when hit with the dart and mumbled an "ouchies..." before slumping in the chair. He twitched all the while he was being carried off, oblivious to his seductive cohorts machinations.

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Mr. Puss Puss, the cute and cuddly EVIL CAT OF DOOM, simply swished his tail as he walked into the same room as everyone else. He sat at the front of the door and rose his little kitty eyebrow, "Goddamned humans...always getting in the way..." Standing up to oh so sensually walked towards the desk. He hopped up on it and looked to Ms. Booby Larue. He smiled, the only way cats could and grumbled to himself, "I should POO IN YOUR LAP YOU WENCH!" He scratched at his nose and purposely walked all over the keyboard, hoping to cause some damage to Kurt's "evil, but probably extremely idiotic plans to take over the world."

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Booby paused as the woman came into sight, her eyes going round in surprise, mostly at her outfit before she frowns and drops her hand to her side where a gun rests to only pull up.....a pad of paper and a pencil. "Where DID you get that outfit!?! Oh....and you wanna get kinky wif me and zee Boss, too? The more the marrier I believe zat saying goes...." She blinks as the computer begins to speak and stays quiet for a few moments before her eyes widen. "Yes! I have just the place for zee to send zat virus to, Mr. Computer...send it... insert Dun Dun DUN music the corporation that made Barney and de Teletubbies!...oh and if you have any suggestions for those big....government places go ahead and send them there too, Mr. computer.." She grins brightly and then pulls Kurt closer, her eyes going back to the other woman, "I don't know.....I want Kurt for myself...." She eyes the cat and pouts, her lower lip trembling slightly, "I never did anything to you....oh wait....well. the shaving thing was an accident....you see I was always told that pusses should be shaved...you shouldn't be so mad....you'll be furry again soon...and I'll leave you be zen...It truly was an accident Mr. Puss...." 

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Lenore giggled 'There's this really awesome store at the mall. It's called Sexy Spies R Us. They sell the most amazing clothes. You should come shopping with me one time.' As she was talking, Lenore reached around to the back of her suit with her left hand, and then pulled out a SigSauer, semi-automatic pistol and aimed it at Booby's head. "hand over Kurt and I won't splatter your pretty pink brains all over the walls "

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Jujei smirked then walked out some. He looked out, two henchmen on the left, and three on the right, "How can I possibly get out of this one...?" He began to think for a moment, when suddenly the two henchmen on the left charge at him, he then suddenly ran up the wall and rebound off it, and did an inward crescent kick to the fist, before grabbing the other by the shoulders, and doing a little Matrix thing, before kicking him behind the head, and knocking him over the railing. He landed, turned, and slid into a shaolin-fighting stance, "And that's kicking your ass!"

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Jujei turned to the three behind him some, "Okay boys, come get me!" one charged to him, he then flipped into the air, and placed his hands atop his head, and twisted his neck around some. He landed behind him, the man facing him, he then kicked him in the balls some, the man went crossed-eyed, "You...Win.."he said in a really high pitched voice. He then turned around to the other two, he then twirled around and ended in the splits, "Okay, who's next..!?" they both stepped forward some, then looked at each other, and then turned the other way and ran like scarred children

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The computer that Mr. Puss Puss was tromping on brought up another screen as it did as Booby Larue had told it to, and then yet another: a red screen that popped up with a message: "EVIL MASTER PLAN ACTIVATED: COLUMBIAN COFFEE FIELDS DESTRUCTION IMMENENT." And with that, the super laser machine thingy mabober in the other side of the room turned on and started firing away. 

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Oblivious to everything around him, Kurt hung limply like a rag doll in Booby's arms. He snored loudly and mumbled something to the point of "must...take...over...small...city-state...OOH...pancakes...must...have...pancakes..." and then went back under.

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Mr. Puss Puss sat there on the keyboard, "Fuckin' Right, Jigga... I fucked up all your bitches Coffee Fields, mother fucker." He began jumping on the keyboard again, "MAN! I WANNA PLAY ME AMOTHER FUCKIN GAME MOTHER FUCKIN EVIL SOLITARE, MOTHER FUCKER!!" But..yet again, no luck. He waited...computer sounded like it was working, "Yeah!! Solitaire mah bizzitches. Don't get up in mah grill..." He grinned evilly and looked at Booby Larue, "You know what, ho!! I will scratch your goddamned eyes out, bi-OTCH!" Of course...this evil kitty had already done that...Booby hadn't been paying attention. So there sat a nice steaming pile of cat shit in Boob's lap, and an evil grin, or whatever. In someway or another, his right paw formed into that of the "West Side" sign, and he waved around some. Turning back to the computer screen...Barney's play house Website. His paw coming up to smack himself in the face, Puss Puss stared at the screen for a moment, "Mental note... Kill THAT mother fucker." Now, please note, that all of this speaking here...can't be heard by the human ears, cuz Puss Puss is the mother fuckin shit, yo. 

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Booby blinks as she stares at the woman, writing down what she said quickly before looking back up and into the barrel of a gun. She sighs softly before giggling, "Oh....DO YOU REALLY think my brains would be pretty? I mean...I know the rest of me is but that would just top it all of vouldn't it?" She grins brightly before blinking and tossing the pad of paper on the desk with the pen, "Why do you want mah Kurt? I know! You want his evil master plan thingy in his brain! You evil cretin! I'll never let you....besides...I have a brain too, ya know...I'm not just a bunch of big boob's with a perfect body....don't hate me cause I'm boobyfull..." Before being distracted by the computer once again, "Well look at that...I'm sure this one will surprise Old Jack Bond....the evil thingy is working..." She looks back over at the woman with the gun once again, "Oh alright....but when you're done with him I want him back...I saw him first ya know!" She pulls the dart out of the side of his neck before frowning at the cat on the computers keyboard, she could understand some of it, she was like Bubbles from PowerPuff Girls, having the ability to understand squirrel and talk to them, she just had the ability to understand the cat...and annoy the hell out of him. She giggles before her nose wiggles at the cat crap on her lap, how that happened was beyond her since she had been standing. "Oh...you are good, Mr. Puss Puss....but I apologised.....why must we be always at one another's throats? Why can't we all just get along..." Suddenly the screen began to sing the song for Barney, "I love you, You love Me.. " She screams and her hand drops quickly to the gun at her side, slipping it from its holster and aiming she shot the computer, the bullet wizzing right over the cats head before she finally began to breath again at the sound of crackling and broken wires. She was just happy that wasn't the only computer Kurt had, 

otherwise she would have just ruined his master plan.... She blinks as she glances to the sign underneath the computer and reads aloud, "Main Secret Computer of Multiple Evil Deeds......oiy...damn...."

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Harold walks up to where he sees the cat. Sighs and looks at him" Mr Puss Puss taking over the world does take time but it is so hard to not go to the litterbox to do your evil deeds?". Gestures with his face to the crap as he sighs. "And yet again I'm the one cleaning up after the little shit ..." sighs. He grabs paper towel and cleans up the shit that had fallen on the floor. " Please Mr Puss Puss has to use the cat box... from now on....". He sighs and tosses the crap to a garbage can and sprays the carpet with febreeze.

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Lenore almost bent double with laughter, looking at the destroyed computer. 'Well that saves me attaching a bomb to it. I swear I won't be long with Kurt, and I won't hurt him. Then you can have him all to yourself for as long as you want. I'll even throw in a few ermmmmm, kinkeh toys?" She hoped the girl would agree, she seemed ditzy enough

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Kurt fell to the ground in a heap, his ass sticking fairly unattractively, *unless you're one of those huge fan-girls.* in the air as Booby shoots the computer. At that, the machine falls over, even though it was simply the computer being shot, and goes up in a huge explosion of metal and...things and stuff. Another plan down the drain. but HEY, at least this one STARTED to WORK! And he wasn't even AWAKE to SEE IT!

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HomieJiggaWhutWhut-PussPuss stared at the computer screen in pure shock. "WHUT THE FUCK!! BITCH!!" He spun around and stared at her, "I was enjoying me some mother fuckin' thought about killing that purple homosexual bitch!! I'mma fry his ass!!!" He looked at his lowly man servant and flipped him off, "BITCH!! Don't trip, foo!! I'mma shit where ever the fuck I want to Holmes...Wait...look!!" He hopped off the desk and onto Kurt's ass all up in the air and shit, "OH LOOK!! I"MMA SHIT ON THIS FUCKERS GHETTO BOOTAY!! Man, my grandma has a better ass than this fool!!" And with that, he took a little poo-poo on Kurt's butt. "Take that mother fucker... That's for changing mah litter, too! I LIKED THE MOTHER FUCKIN' FRESH STEP, B!!" He snarled, and hopped off the now shitted on bootay. He trodded off and sat down next to the computer screen which was now on the floor, "MAN! I WANTED TO PLAY ME SOME MOTHER FUCKIN SOLITAIRE!!!! e snarled, and shot an evil glance at Booby, "Man...you know something, bitch..." He began to trod back to you, "You can lick my MOTHERFUCKING ASS!!!" He hopped off the desk again, and pissed on her foot. Walking off, his tail swishing, "Peace, Bitches. I'mma go take me a mother fuckin' cat nap."

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Harold, shocked by what happened" Bad Kitty you little bastard.." he grunted. He grabbed more paper towel and cleaned off the mans booty. He whipped out his febreeze from his belt and sprayed the shoe after he wiped it down. " I'm sorry usually Mr Puss Puss is more interested in how to get warheads then peein' and shitting everywhere". He cleaned up and scooted off and seeing the crap that Mr Puss Puss had done before accidentally stuck to the wall he looked at it and sniffed it " hmmm " sprayed it down with febreeze and left it there. "Someone will think its one of them new air fresheners. The paper had weakened due to the sprits and as he walked back the cat shit had plopped on the ground. He scooted over to them only slide and slip flying into the air sideways off of the slippery turd.

he flew into the air sideways and blinked as he crashed to the floor. He then looked and saw the other shit and piss he cleaned up land right on his face. "Ok that's it he has pissed on his last shoe".

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Booby looked back to the cat woman after a moment before she sighs and mutters, "Fine...but don't keep him too long..." Then he suddenly fell at her feet, her head falling to the side as his butt stuck up in the air she sighs softly, "Now mister K...so help me if you are like THAT I will have to straighten you out...."

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She watches as the cat poops on Kurt and blinks before she pulls him back up to his feet and pushes him towards the woman, sighing softly as she wonders how she is going to tell him that his latest plan was ruined. She'd blame it on the cat....and have proof probably against the cat since he had pooped on Kurt...

No then he'd be pissed at her even more...she'd blame it on Sean....she didn't like him that much anyways! The bumbling fool...always muttering about the walls moving on him... Yes, that was her master plan, she'd blame Sean and then Kurt would never know...unless the cat told...but either way she was safe for if he did tell then Kurt would know it had ultimately been Barney's fault...and eventually they -would- kill that freak of nature. She frowns and turns her attention back to Mr. Puss, "I don't lick pussies!" She blinks, eyes wide for a moment as she thinks that one over in the sudden silence before glaring at Mr. Puss's servant, "Give him back his stupid Fresh Step before he begins to leave presents in all of my shoes...." She gasps and suddenly wonders if the little furless shit had done that yet, believing the code locked door that protected her treasure trove of millions of shoes would keep them safe from the evil cat. She turns her attention back to Kurt, now laying against the other woman before looking down at the turd that had fell from his butt to the floor, "Well...clean it up...umm....umm.." She couldn't remember his name and shrugs, "Clean it up slave of Mr. Puss Puss.." And he did...and then wiped off her shoe that the cat had pissed on....."Gah...someday I will kill that cat...OH!" Her eyes lit up with an actual idea as she began to scheme and plot on getting Barney to come visit Mr. Puss Puss...well to get him to come visit him and prevent herself from killing the dinosaur before he could torture the evil cat. 

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Lenore just shook her head and grabbed Kurt, dragging him down the corridor she had entered, trying to get him outside to the helicopter, waiting to take them back to the mansion.

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Kurt, while being dragged to the helicopter, his feet making thumping sounds as they hit the floor, began to regain consciousness after a second, though, and looked around drowsily, glancing up at Lenore. "Are...you zhe landlady??? But...I TOLD you I'd have my rent TOMORROW! Just as soon as zhe British sent me zhat 5 MILLION! Don't kick me out! Zhis is zhe only SUPER EVIL VILLIAN HIDEOUT APARTMENT COMPLEX I can AFFORD! You CAN'T EVICT ME!"


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